Title: Falling Into Place
Prompt: #47 - Heart
Rating: PG, swears
Characters: Fuu, Ferio
NOTES!: Inspired by this. Sad!fluff. It's a bit all over the place, maybe? I'm not sure.
When he tells her that he loves her for the first time, it's while the world crumbles outside. It's in between battles that she fights, battles that leave marks on his lower lip from biting it too hard when all he can do is watch. It's while uncertainty and despair and panic and death are looming over everyone in the country. It's quietly, in one of the further corridors, where no one will interrupt them.
He didn't expect her to cry this way. He didn't expect her to shake her head, to press a hand against his chest to keep him at a distance. He planned to take her into his arms and perhaps finally kiss her, and for her to say that she loves him too.
But her hand presses to her mouth as if to quiet sobs as tears fall from her eyes. His stomach drops and he doesn't know what to do. “I'm sorry,” he offers. This makes her cry harder and he decides, fuck it, and pulls her close despite her reservations. Once in his embrace, her arms tie around him, clutching at the fabric on the back of his tunic, her face buried in his shoulder.
She cries silently for a while and he feels like he's swallowed broken glass.
Finally, after what seems like a long time, she leans back. Her head is dipped down, her hair hiding her face. She wipes at her cheeks with her palm. Her hand is shaking.
His hand closes around her wrist, gently pulling it away. He releases it, then tips her chin up so he can look into her face. It's streaked with tears, her eyes red and wet, her nose swollen. He's never seen her cry this way; she always puts on a strong face for everyone.
She's beautiful. He tells her so. She pulls her chin out of his hand, looking away. He leans to catch her eye, but she keeps averting her gaze.
“What's so wrong, Fuu?” he whispers.
Her breath is catching between deep breaths. She curls her hands against his chest, avoiding his gaze but not pulling away. “I just wish you wouldn't love me so much,” she says, and he can barely hear her.
His heart is breaking. “I'm sorry. I thought it was mutual.”
She hits one of her palms against his chest. “It is, you idiot,” she says, just as softly as before.
“Then why –”
Her hands retreat, curled up under her chin. “You shouldn't,” she babbles. “I'm a stranger in this world, I won't be here for long. I do bad things, I hurt people, I kill people. I pout when someone hurts my feelings and I always try to hide it. I sometimes manipulate people to get them to do what I want. My eyebrows are a stupid shape. I have innocent blood on my hands, the blood of your sister, who wanted nothing but to love. I just... I don't...” Her fingers curl against her mouth, choking back sobs.
“Okay, stop.” He catches her hands, holding them in his. “You need to stop.” She tries to pull away and he softens his tone. “Fuu, listen to me. I don't care about any of those things. I care about you. And I've told you before, I don't want you apologizing about Emeraude. I want your happiness.”
“I suppose I'm failing you there, as well.”
“Cut it out.”
“I will say whatever I want –”
He releases her hands, grabbing her face and kissing her firmly on the mouth. For a split second she tries to pull away and he almost releases her, guilt hitting him in the gut. But then she leans into him, grasping at his back again, her lips returning the motions. Her mouth is hot from crying and tastes like tears but he doesn't care as she presses her frail body against his. He murmurs her name against her lips, his hands sliding to circle her shoulders, and she moans softly.
He reluctantly breaks the kiss, her breath rushed against his face. “Fuu,” he whispers. “Every time you leave with the girls to fight, my heart is in my throat because I haven't told you that I love you. I know it's stupid to have to say it, it's trite, I know. I just... I'm sorry.”
“You needn't be sorry,” she says.
“I've made you cry.”
“You've finally kissed me.”
“I suppose there's that.”
The darkness in her face has lightened considerably. “I just apologize for being the one you fell in love with.”
He tightens his grip around her waist. “Never be.”
“I'm not even –”
He quiets her with a soft kiss. “You and me, we're made of the same stuff,” he says, resting his forehead against hers. “We're perfect, you know? I know that you know. Stop deceiving yourself on purpose and thinking I don't see that, okay? You know. We're the forest and the mountains and the dirt and the wild flowers and you know what I mean, don't say that you don't.”
She reluctantly smiles, just the slightest bit. “What you're saying is so nonsensical.” Her hands reach up to hold his face. “But yes, I understand exactly what you mean. Our hearts are made of the same substances. I've known it for some time. It's why I love you.”
Something lifts off his chest and he can breathe right again. Her fingers are tracing his face and she is closer than she ever has been. “I'm sorry for making you cry.”
“I made myself cry, of course.”
Thunder rattles the palace and Ferio winces. Fuu's face is still flushed and tear-stained but her eyes are more steady now, the eyes that he's used to seeing. The eyes that choose to be strong for his country and for him, but mostly for herself. Her fingers brush his lips, hesitant. He kisses her fingertips, earning one of those trademark blushes that he loves so much. “I don't want to be the cause of your tears,” he says.
“You've always been worth it,” she whispers.
He shakes his head, about to protest. This time she is the one who silences him with a kiss, her thumbs tracing the shape of his jaw. He kisses both her cheeks and the center of her forehead as their hands find each other, fingers entwining. “I believe with all of my being that we'll be together,” he says quietly against her temple. “And I think if you believe it too, it will happen. I want to be with you.”
“I want to be with you, too.”
“Then I'm not worried. You'll come back.”
“I'm sorry for crying.”
“I'm sorry for confessing my love.”